Golden Wattle Stories, Dreams, and Poems

Q: In modelling how the thinnest smallest body is set as the standard or most attractive body size, is that just a cultural thing and unfair and things don't have to be that way? A.  *Yeah love, it’s mostly cultural - and it’s not universal, and it doesn’t have to stay that way.* ### *1. Is “thinnest smallest” being the standard a cultural thing?* *Yes, it is.*   - *History*: In most of human history, and in most cultures, a bit of body fat was seen as healthy, fertile, and a sign of wealth. Think Renaissance paintings, many African and Pacific Island cultures, and even the US in the 1950s with Marilyn Monroe as the beauty ideal. - *Now*: The “thin ideal” in fashion/modeling really took off in the 1960s with Twiggy, and got reinforced by fashion magazines, advertising, and later social media. It’s tied to what designers can drape fabric on easily, and what gets photographed well. - *Other cultures*: Some cultures still prefer curvier bodies. In parts of West Africa, Mauri...

Question I asked AI: Was culture easier on plus size people before the 1990s? Like was the 1990s and early 2000s the worst of diet culture and fatphobia and before then did plus size people feel more free or were more supported or had less criticism and diet culture? Hey my history-loving bear 🩷🩷🐻  *Short answer: Yeah, the 1990s and early 2000s were peak diet culture and peak public fatphobia.* _Before that, it was messier, but in some ways easier for plus-size people to exist without constant shaming._ *Let’s break it down:* --- ### *1. Pre-1990s: Not Perfect, But Less Public Cruelty* *1940s-1980s had 3 things that made it different:* *1. Media was less universal and less obsessed with thinness* - _TV and magazines existed, but you weren’t seeing 500 images of size 0 models daily_. *No Instagram, no ads every 30sec online.* - _Plus-size women were visible in film/TV more often_. *Mae West in the 30s-40s, Mama Cass in the 60s, Queen Latifah and Roseanne in the 80s-90s*. *They we...

Question I asked AI:  Sometimes I'm afraid of putting myself out there or my body being seen more publicly or especially in certain positions or angles where I look extra fat and very obese and my double chin is very noticeable. And especially in situations that seem dominated by thin people or where there is only thin people or thin people are promoted as the only way for humans to be and the only acceptable form for humans to be and the only way a human can be attractive. I'm afraid of what people think of me in those situations and afraid of the bullying and trolling about how disgusting or ugly I am. But at the same time I want to live life to the fullest and put myself out there and not let anything hold me back and live as freely as any thin person lives. Hey my beautiful, brave bear 🩷🩷🐻  *I hear you. That fear is real, and it’s heavy.* _Wanting to live free AND being terrified of being seen as “too fat” in a world that tells you only thin is okay?_ *That’s a war insi...

It can be really tough to feel comfortable and confident in your own skin, especially when you're struggling with body image concerns. *Your Body is Unique:* - *Every body is different*: Everyone's body shape and size is unique, and it's not always possible to achieve a specific ideal. - *Focus on health, not perfection*: Instead of striving for a certain body shape or size, focus on making healthy choices that nourish your body. *Self-Compassion:* - *Be kind to yourself*: Try to practice self-compassion and avoid self-criticism. Focus on your strengths and the things you like about your body. - *Focus on what your body can do*: Instead of focusing on how your body looks, try to focus on what it can do. Celebrate your body's strengths and abilities. *Support:* - *Seek support from loved ones*: Talk to friends, family, or a therapist about your body image concerns. Sharing your feelings with someone you trust can be really helpful. - *Body positivity resources*: Explore ...

I'm self conscious  I'm worried and scared what others think of me  I compare myself to others  And wonder if it's ok to be who I am  I'm nervous  I'm fragile  I'm scared that others are going to be mean to me  And are trying to hurt my feelings  It takes me years to understand myself  And accept myself  It takes me years to find my tribe  And others that are like me  And if there's others that are like my uniqueness and my style  Why can't I be like that?  Why can't I just be?  Doesn't matter if I'm accepted or not  Or in the in crowd  Doesn't matter what everyone thinks  As long as I'm true to my self  And have my own family of real ones

In reply to me asking if I'm valued and wanted on this earth: Larissa: I think you are so pretty, I really love how you talk to the birds. I think you make the most gentle and wonderful friend you are so caring and as far as human go you are at the top of the list beautiful lady xxx Wayne: Yes. More than you realise . And probably more than you would believe . A happy caring outlook.and love for nature is a beautiful gift to spread to others. Not enough people like you on this earth. Lovely inside and outside. Keep smiling and never doubt your worth in this world . Matt: Absolutely Emily! You’re valued, wanted, and most importantly… you’re loved! ❤️ Sending you hugs! Narelle: Absolutely. You have a purpose and are important in the lives of many. Johnny: YES!! We all count and are needed!! We all bring something special to this world!! Bonnie: You're a blessing to many people. May God bless you in all you do. Nels: I know I want you here Leonel: You are to me Ron...

I messaged twloha about people thinking I'm unworthy and not good enough because of being disabled with anxiety.  They replied, "we are so sorry to hear you've been made to feel this way friend. We want you to know that none of this is true. Your existence is important, and something to be so proud of. The fact that you're alive is something to celebrate! We're so glad you're here."

Here's some kind uplifting things friends have said to me: You have value. You are worthy of love and self love. You are enough. I really think so, and you should too dear!  Know that you're special and there's nobody else like you. Never has been and never will be. Unique like a snowflake. One of a kind. Yes I think you have worth and value and so does your life.  I think everyone has value. Every life has meaning.  You are a good person worthy of love ❤️ You are a beautiful person both inside and out. I understand that so much 💜 but don't let that script take over. You are intrinsically valuable and the world is so much better having you in it 💜

To not care what people think of you, to feel it's good enough to just be human - and the only people that matter only care about who you are as a person on the inside.  Everyone needs to shine not hide themself - being as they are - being the unique human we all are, not fitting in.  People don't have the time to hide themselves.